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~I’m sorry

~I’m sorry~

 

I’m sorry
im feeling terrible
dont know what to do
i keep on thinking and thinking

 

I just cant put it off..
I dont know what to do anymore

 

These feelings or uncertainty
of pain
these tears
Is life worth it?

 

I dont know
Im feeling hurt
left alone..
like there’s no one who cares
why?
why did you all gave me this feeling?

 

I just dont understand
and i doubt ill ever will
I guess you’ll also never understand my point of view
my pain
my feelings
my tears
you all never felt them..

 

I guess its useless..
doubt there’s a way back
I doubt there’s a reason..

 

I know there’s a reason for my way of doing..

 

its unbearable, all this pain, tears, fights I have with myself
fights to not hurt myself
fights to keep the ghosts out of my head
but i cant keep on fighting
i have lost my energy

 

Its like fighting against the thirst you have when you’re in the dessert
You can fight it, but in the end you wont have any energy left
you think about giving up
thats the point where i am now
the point of giving up..

 

giving up my life
if you can call it a life
what i feel from it, its been useless
and it will forever be like this
forgive me for all the pain i caused you
All the sleepless nights
all the worries
all the hurt
but most of all, forgive me because of this.

 

Try to not forget me,
to keep me in mind as a happy person
a loving person
a carrying person
a person with more love for you then for herself..

 

my love will always be yours..
Please forgive me..

 

Its too hard, i hate to be a loser
but i just cant
i cant live
not like this
not with this pain

 

Please forgive me..

 

Farewell..